So what am I gonna find here?

60second momBITS is a place for you to get quick tips and ideas for raising children from a teacher's perspective. This can include anything from how to implement a quick reading lesson in the car to how to interpret what the teacher said when you picked little Jimmy up from school today.

Mom's are busy, we all know that. If you had time to read all day about raising your kids, you probably would. All of the momBITS here are meant for you to read in under 60 seconds. This way you take in a quick parenting thought, focus on your full-time job, go to ballet and soccer practice, make dinner, do laundry, walk the dog, etc., etc., etc. and still have time to yourself and your partner at the end of the day. (And feel good about what you did and the choices you made, too!)

Friday, October 21, 2011

WAIT TIL YOUR FATHER HEARS ABOUT THIS!

I mentioned in the last post that when a child is sent to another person (Mom->Dad, Teacher->Principal) to be dealt with behavior wise, the “sender” potentially loses some of his/her authority to the “sendee,” if you will.

Children are very observant and if their issue gets pushed off from one person to another, the person who sent them away loses some credibility and has less authority in the kid’s eyes. It's possible that the child will feel he has been given even more reason to brush off and maybe even not take too seriously the person who was originally in the role of authority. (Mom, Dad, Teacher, Grandma, Uncle, you get the idea, anyone.)

If your child is just absolutely defying you with every bone of their body and you say something like “JUST WAIT TIL YOUR FATHER GETS HOME!" then you'll have to deal with your unyielding child whenever Dad's not home. The same goes for a teacher who sends the child to the Principal’s Office.  Kids can be difficult and ultimately sometimes you don’t have the time, the energy, or what feels like the will to discipline your child. But just know that as soon as you hand off the power to someone else, the child will probably notice and it could potentially lead to more trouble when you’re alone with him or her in the future. Don't lose your credibility. Be the authority, even when it’s hard and you really, really don't want to. 

Having said this, I want to note that I am not at all saying parents shouldn’t work together, or teacher and principals either for that matter. There should always be a cooperative, unanimously planned course of action for discipline. What I am saying though is here is a perspective that while maybe isn’t perfect for you, is something that you hadn’t thought of quite yet.

Good luck out there!  

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